proses and pieces...

2004-04-04T06:49:00.000-07:00

Stoned

I stare blankly at the wall
Feeling all the pain I have inside
The rose in me begins to whither and fall
Silent tears become a loud cry
My heart slowly falls apart
Each beat of it tells me not where to go
Things are never the same for me anymore
Lifeless as the world is to me it shows
They stare back at me
Knowing not why this become of me

DEC. 1, 2002

2004-04-04T06:16:00.000-07:00

BAMBOO R-O-C-K-S!!!

i really do not know much bout bamboo... when i first heard them (the band.. well,..okay... as well as bamboo's voice), they did catch my attention,... but then thinking they were "just" another local band, i did not mind knowing who they really are... it was when i saw them on mtv with their song "noypi" that i got intrigued and told myself that we (the filipinos) sure got some talents (and culture..) to brag about...

this day sure is another special one for me!! coz this is the day when i got to meet BAMBOO personally!!
im not really a die-hard fan of them, i just enjoy their music... how they (esp bamboo) mix their music, how they deliver it and the lines they use... just so grrrreeeeaaat!!

thanks to my friend, myg, who just like me got nothing to do with this oh-so-boring-and-lonesome day that she invited me to go to the mall and just stroll round (oh, we went videokeing by the way! :D) when we heard bamboo's voice and some real rockin' instruments! so we went to where their music is calling from, and there they were, some dudes rockin' their hearts out... without second thoughts, i went to the counter and bought myself an album of the Bamboo's... i also had my insert signed by each (read my lips... e-a-c-h...) member of the band... i could say that they not only have the talent, but also the hots!! :D they just made my day!!

im inviting everyone (especially my fellow filipinos) to purchase their album, for only 250, and support our local music!

they sure add some boosting to my FILIPINO pride!

peace y'all!!! God bless!!

2004-04-02T22:50:00.000-08:00

Suddenly

Left alone again
In this one dark corner
After all the joy
After all the highs

You promised you’d never leave
Again, you’ll never do the same
You told me to trust you
You said you’d love me true

I’ve tried to build me again
The barrier I once had
To keep myself then
From all the pain…all the angst…all the bad

‘twas when you came
They were all broken down
Just like a summer’s rain
So fast… so sudden…

-April 2, 2004

2004-04-01T22:49:00.000-08:00

Stubborn life…

I never learn!! So stubborn, that is me… I trip myself, I try to pick me up, yes I stand once again, but still I fail to learn… I never get pass through the obstacles I am faced with… though I get to realize my mistakes and learn from them, or should I say must have learned from them, I still end up facing the same challenge and tend to face down… Wanna know what challenge/ obstacle I am always faced with? … falling in love!… pathetic, you may say… but what can I do? Just as how we are unique and set apart from each other, the same goes with how we are given individual obstacles in life… Unfortunately, I was given the most pathetic one, I say… I have been in-love many times… or was I? Okay, let’s just put it this way.. I have felt the oh-my-god-I-am-so-happy-with-this-guy-I-want-to-spend-the-rest-of-my-life-with-him-we-are-so-perfect-together FEELING a gazillion times already!!!…. and yet, have not learned… I easily fall, they say… I get side-tracked whenever I think “I am now strong, no one can break me down”… I guess that’s the price I should pay for getting started so early… I should have listened to my parents.. I shouldn’t have disobeyed (as if…)…
Once, I thought, “alas! I got passed through this stage!” for an incident I shall never forget… but to my dismay, I am still to be judged… After ending a relationship –a real good one as how most of my friends and family thought and said-, I told myself “thou shall enter not another relationship until thou hadst seen thyself clearly”…. Hah! I have made my convictions and shall stand strong with them… That, I also thought… but then, after a month, I found myself slowly deteriorating, breaking and compromising my convictions… I was never convicted! I started denying and telling myself that I have never felt this way before and that this guy was made for me… All were foolishness and stubborn acts during that time! In spite of my knowledge about my stupidity, I still denied and grew the pain I seeded and planted myself… After eons of denial and sacrifices, I finally bumped my head and made myself admit and realize the truth…

That was part 1… now, I’ve gotten myself (again) into another “relationship”.. or should I say, a “relationship in progress”… with all the mistakes I’ve committed before, I now feel good about myself for having entered the learning stage of my life.. After all the realizations, contemplations and reflections, I am starting to piece myself together and continue to search for what I really want in life… I’ve realized that life does not end with having met someone you’d like to spend the rest of your life with… Life is not all about love, although one can not get through life without love… Life itself is full of twists and turns which predetermines the next step or stage of your life… right now? I’m still stuck in the maze and mystery of love and life…